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The Official Movie You Just Watched Thread

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^ what the hell does that mean? And you missed the first 30 minutes!?!?!??!!?!!?!

 

 

ya what the heck? sociopolitical dialogue? please expand cause this isn't registering at all...

 

I was at my parents' house on Saturday and they were about maybe 30-60 min in when I showed up. Not long before the 'twist'. And by 'sociopolitical' I mean more the feminist/misogynist perspectives on the film. which i was naturally googling as i watched because it's not hard to see the movie as 'bitches be crazy' but my head hurts trying to parse thru all the perspectives. i liked the ending.

Edited by t-sauce

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San Andreas

better than i thought it would be. pretty entertaining for a cookie cutter script and bleh actors. worth a casual watch.

 

Avengers: Age of Ultron

didn't really do it for me. kind of bored with these movies at this point. thor is always dope though.

 

seeing Jurassic World tomorrow night. pretty amped for the nostalgia.

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Any of you guys watched Sense8 on Netflix?

I finished it up the other day and had to push through some of those early episodes.  The concept is pretty cool, 8 people are all connected through each others mind and can speak to each other telepathically and borrow each others skills when they need them. 

The show itself was a mixed bag for me though.  Some of the writing was very weak which led to some of the weaker actors (especially the trans woman, she is not a very good actress) to just be very cringe-worthy every time they were on screen.  Some of the cheesy dialogue worked well for some characters, the Lito storyline was just chock full of terrible one liners, but I think much of it was intentional due to his job as a Mexican telenovelas actor.

One of the big complaints I kept hearing from other people was the structure of the show.  It does jump around quite a bit, very similar to what the Wachowskis did in Cloud Atlas; so if you hated Cloud Atlas, you'll probably hate this. 

The show gets a lot better about midway through with some very awesome action scenes and intense moments.  I was really on the fence with this show for the first half of the season, but I am glad I stuck with it; the payoff for sticking with it ends with some hilariously awesome scenes for some of the characters.  I'd say if you still find it somewhat interesting by episode 4, finish the series, because it does pick up quite a bit in the later half of the season.  But I imagine a lot of people will outright hate this show from the first episode.  Also be warned, they filmed live child births for this show, that's all I'm going to say.

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^ Sounds like a dumber Orphan Black. No thanks.

Jurassic World

http://uproxx.com/filmdrunk/2015/06/jurassic-world-combines-exciting-dinosaur-action-with-obnoxious-little-kids-crying/

http://uproxx.com/movies/2015/06/jurassic-world-review/

Both Uproxx reviews gave it a C+ and say its the 2nd best Jurassic Park movie. I think thats way too high, but maybe that’s because I loved the first one so much, and this was just a shittier, faker looking remake. This movie was probably worse than Jurassic Park III, which I mostly hate because I don’t remember anything about it, except for the cool ending, which was basically the jumping off point for Jurassic World (talking to Raptors and having the military show up).

Probably the worst thing about Jurassic World is that it suffers from Prometheus syndrome: the cool concept sucks you in, but apart from Chris Pratt, every character is a fucking idiot (except for the kids for the most part, who probably would have been fine without the stupid adults around). Seriously, every dumb character doubles down on their stupid hardcore belief, and just makes everything worse. They also try to shove down a bunch of different lessons down your throat that don’t really make any god damn sense. Fiendish Dr. Wu was right: why are they complaining about genetically modifying the Dinosaurs even more, when they’ve been doing it for 22 years (and without giving them the Feathers and stuff that they’re supposed to have)? And if 2 people die right off the bat, then maybe its probably time to stop using non-lethal weapons to bring down your camoflauged, insane super beast (for the purpose of saving $22 million against closing down the park forever? That’s a bad cost-benefit analysis folks). But whatevs, they keep listening to dumb Bryce Dallas Howard the entire time anyway, even though she’s clearly completely incompetent at everything she does in this movie. I guess her only win in this movie is that they shoehorn in probably the worst romance I’ve ever seen in a movie? Poor Chris Pratt and her have 0 chemistry or connection, and its painful to watch, but i guess it hymanizes her or some shit.

Basically this movie is just one big typical horror movie, and I expected more from it because they kept introducing cool ideas, but then just gave up on them to focus on all the stupid, stupid decisions so that they could force the dinosaur fights. And the ending just feels like a dinosaur fight scene choreographed by a little kid who just wanted to smash his toy dinosaurs together and see what happens. Its cheesy and predictable too. I can’t wait til the Honest Trailer comes out for this.

Final complaint: for a movie with so, so, so much blatant product placement, they definitely missed out on a chance to make hot annoying ginger rock some adidas track shoes or something. No effin way could she out run FREAKING DINOSAURS IN THE JUNGLE while wearing those huge heels.

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^ Sounds like a dumber Orphan Black. No thanks.

Jurassic World

http://uproxx.com/filmdrunk/2015/06/jurassic-world-combines-exciting-dinosaur-action-with-obnoxious-little-kids-crying/

http://uproxx.com/movies/2015/06/jurassic-world-review/

Both Uproxx reviews gave it a C+ and say its the 2nd best Jurassic Park movie. I think thats way too high, but maybe that’s because I loved the first one so much, and this was just a shittier, faker looking remake. This movie was probably worse than Jurassic Park III, which I mostly hate because I don’t remember anything about it, except for the cool ending, which was basically the jumping off point for Jurassic World (talking to Raptors and having the military show up).

Probably the worst thing about Jurassic World is that it suffers from Prometheus syndrome: the cool concept sucks you in, but apart from Chris Pratt, every character is a fucking idiot (except for the kids for the most part, who probably would have been fine without the stupid adults around). Seriously, every dumb character doubles down on their stupid hardcore belief, and just makes everything worse. They also try to shove down a bunch of different lessons down your throat that don’t really make any god damn sense. Fiendish Dr. Wu was right: why are they complaining about genetically modifying the Dinosaurs even more, when they’ve been doing it for 22 years (and without giving them the Feathers and stuff that they’re supposed to have)? And if 2 people die right off the bat, then maybe its probably time to stop using non-lethal weapons to bring down your camoflauged, insane super beast (for the purpose of saving $22 million against closing down the park forever? That’s a bad cost-benefit analysis folks). But whatevs, they keep listening to dumb Bryce Dallas Howard the entire time anyway, even though she’s clearly completely incompetent at everything she does in this movie. I guess her only win in this movie is that they shoehorn in probably the worst romance I’ve ever seen in a movie? Poor Chris Pratt and her have 0 chemistry or connection, and its painful to watch, but i guess it hymanizes her or some shit.

Basically this movie is just one big typical horror movie, and I expected more from it because they kept introducing cool ideas, but then just gave up on them to focus on all the stupid, stupid decisions so that they could force the dinosaur fights. And the ending just feels like a dinosaur fight scene choreographed by a little kid who just wanted to smash his toy dinosaurs together and see what happens. Its cheesy and predictable too. I can’t wait til the Honest Trailer comes out for this.

Final complaint: for a movie with so, so, so much blatant product placement, they definitely missed out on a chance to make hot annoying ginger rock some adidas track shoes or something. No effin way could she out run FREAKING DINOSAURS IN THE JUNGLE while wearing those huge heels.

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Jurassic World

so bad. I give it a C purely because I kind of felt some nostalgia (Dino DNA helix made an appearance!) 

waaaaaaay too slow a first act. so much hype of the park and showing how great it is. Ya ya we get it, we know what's going to happen so let's move the show along. Characters are not redeeming at all. The young kid was so annoying. Everyone should have gotten eaten immediately. 

CGI coloring/lighting was almost always off and made everything too bright. And yes, we get it Samsung, this is your park. 

 

I guess my biggest gripe, aside from the plot being predictable and flat, was that there were too many upbeat cuts scattered throughout the film. The original set up a sense of dread, and aside from a few human moments (brontosaurus tree scene, kitchen table scene) that dread and darkness loomed all the time. This one would start to get heavy and then wheeeeeee were flying in a helicopter! And then heavy and then hey! I'm gonna rebuild a car after lighting a torch with matches that somehow didn't get wet when we jumped off a WATERFALL. The music shifted, the vibe got  happy/funny, and it just cut up any bit of intensity the movie was starting to build. It just bummed me out because it could have been suspenseful, but it wasn't.

 

Ohhh and one last thing, how did everyone get off the island AND how did it all become okay and fine when there is still a TREX roaming free?!

One more last thing...did the parents end up staying together or divorce?

Edited by weaves

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Just watched A Girl Walks Home Alone at Night the other day and really loved it. The affectation of style in the trailer and apparent hipsterness of the director (see her IMDB pic) was almost a turn off, but Ana Lily Amirpour acquits herself nicely in interviews and actually seems very cool. The movie crosses all these boundaries with a new wave/remodernist vibe that has this spell running through it which I found kind of mesmerizing and really beautiful. Very impressive for a feature debut. It's on Netflix right now.

Another directorial debut that some here have mentioned is Slow West, which I also saw recently. I really like the idea a grim fairy tail in a western shell. It's a great pairing of genre and tone. Michael Fassbender and Ben Mendelsohn are two of my favorite actors currently but they just didn't have solid enough material to work with to give this movie the strong heartbeat it needed, which is a real shame because the stage was set so well otherwise. Still, it was an enjoyable watch.

Finally, I saw A Most Wanted Man for a second time last night and liked it even more than when I saw it in theaters. Watching it as an espionage procedural is a little dull, but as a character study it's so much richer, and PSH is just phenomenal in it. What makes him so fascinating is that despite how downtrodden and haunted he apparently is, his sincerity and veracity distinguish him in a movie that's all about manipulation and betrayal, yet that turns out to be his major flaw. All the quiet moments and deliberately slow pacing pays off so well in that ending for me. Definitely worth watching if you missed it. 

 

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Jurassic World

I agree with with pretty much everything mentioned above by Mixhail and Weaves, but my nostalgia for Jurassic Park doesn't pick up any slack for it. It was trash from start to finish. The script was terrible, it had cringeworthy dialogue, the direction was inept, there was no memorable action, zero chemistry between the two leads (especially that terrible kiss), it failed to take advantage of anything Chris Pratt is really good at, and even the relationship between the brothers was super weak. 

This movie has been in development hell for a while and has apparently gone through several iterations through the treatment and script-writing stages, including a battle for writing credit that went to WGA arbitration. So that's a major red-flag that brings the likes of Alien: Resurrection to mind, and as was the case with with Alien, the studio eventually decided this thing just had to be made from whatever scraps of ideas they had so far. I wouldn't be surprised if Chris Pratt's involvment after Guardians was the key element which thrust this jumbled mess into being. 

It's a great example of what can happen when a mega-budget tent pole is "entrusted" to an unproven director. Colin Trevorrow had no business making this based on the credit of his only other feature, which was a mediocre indie rom-com. That's weird to say after Jurassic World just blew the brakes off the box office, but the truth is this movie didn't have to be good at all; it was going to be a commercial success regardless. It's just kind of sad that so little was done to ensure this was a quality movie, and that's likely to be the case for many more like it. There are probably a few reasons Trevorrow was selected...first because I'm sure he was cheap, but more importantly because he's essentially powerless. The people overseeing the Marvel universe seem to be getting this part right more than others (guys like Shane Black and James Gunn actually bring some personality to the table), but it's becoming a trend that the powers in charge of massive franchise properties don't want to do battle with highly influential auteur directors, and the model for how these movies are made is beginning to mirror television, where the director is basically a gun-for-fire and the real control lies with producers or some equivalent of a showrunner. 

I did appreciate the "I have a boyfriend part," only because I really like Jake Johnson and Laura Lapkus. But that's about it. Hated literally everything else.

 

 

Edited by carmellomangexp

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Spy

pretty funny. i think reviews overhyped it a bit for me, as well as a few family members who saw it a few weeks ago, but overall it was really entertaining. gets me excited that feig is at the helm of the ghostbusters movie. was semi-bored at times, but when mccarthy turns it up a notch about halfway in, it gets really hilarious.

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That's My Boy
I stay away from Adam Sandler movies...but this came on cable and was making me laugh hard enough that I rented it WITH the rated-R jokes.
It's stupid...but with low expectations, it's enjoyable.

Ex Machina
solid sci-fi movie. I like Alex Garland so I was into this.
Does feel like a 'Black Mirror' episode which is high praise if you view it like that. Predictable with where it goes, but fuck it.

John Wick
it's on HBO all the time: I underrated this movie.
I've noticed on Twitter, with just about everybody I follow (Bill Simmons; Robert Mays; theCajunBoy, etc) that it's basically THE ultimate rewatchable movie when it comes on.
I gave it a really hard B+ at best when I saw it as something I loved...but it's something I love even more now.

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That's My Boy
I stay away from Adam Sandler movies...but this came on cable and was making me laugh hard enough that I rented it WITH the rated-R jokes.
It's stupid...but with low expectations, it's enjoyable.

Ex Machina
solid sci-fi movie. I like Alex Garland so I was into this.
Does feel like a 'Black Mirror' episode which is high praise if you view it like that. Predictable with where it goes, but fuck it.

John Wick
it's on HBO all the time: I underrated this movie.
I've noticed on Twitter, with just about everybody I follow (Bill Simmons; Robert Mays; theCajunBoy, etc) that it's basically THE ultimate rewatchable movie when it comes on.
I gave it a really hard B+ at best when I saw it as something I loved...but it's something I love even more now.

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It Follows ~~~~A-

minor classic, I would say
I didn't see David Robert Mitchell's debut (Myth of American Sleepover) but I saw the trailer: it looks like Dazed and Confused.
This has a similar feel to that...but with creepy horror.

I loved it, even if I couldn't sleep for 2 hours this morning (finished the 2nd half in daylight)...it's got a sense of dread I loved and thought it was done well.

Vince Mancini of FilmDrunk saw this in 2014 and had it as a favorite of the year over 'the Babadook'
http://uproxx.com/filmdrunk/2015/03/it-follows-is-a-smart-scary-movie-about-the-terror-of-teen-sexuality/

I think this one will hold up much better over 'the Babadook'
McWeeny loved it too.

Edited by Cassidy

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It Follows ~~~~A-

minor classic, I would say
I didn't see David Robert Mitchell's debut (Myth of American Sleepover) but I saw the trailer: it looks like Dazed and Confused.
This has a similar feel to that...but with creepy horror.

I loved it, even if I couldn't sleep for 2 hours this morning (finished the 2nd half in daylight)...it's got a sense of dread I loved and thought it was done well.

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They Came Together

I'm a pretty big David Wain fan. Role Models being one of my favourite comedy films (despite being his most 'mainstream' attempt) and Paul Rudd being one of my favourite actors (and leading actor in pretty much every David Wain film), it's hard not to love everything this man does. That is why I was a little disappointed when I heard even the strongest Wain fans not dig this movie. So I put off watching it for a while. And then I did. And I laughed a bunch. I liked this more than Wet Hot American Summer. Still not as good as Role Models and Wanderlust because those movies had genuine heart, but definitely cracked up a whole bunch.

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the Guest ~~~~~~~~~~~A-

watched this since I heard the lead of IT FOLLOWS was in this and was good ('It Follows' stuck with me as just an AWESOME movie; smart; done so well with some stuff they threw in here and there they didn't explicitly say that was good)...and she's hot.

the lead of this is a guy from DOWNTON ABBEY and he comes across so so so much like Ryan Gosling meets the lead from Homeland.

I don't want to spoil what the plot is...but it grows to be an awesome movie.

I don't know what to say without spoiling it but I'll agree with Drew McWeeny
http://www.hitfix.com/motion-captured/review-downton-abbey-star-dan-stevens-goes-mad-in-delirious-throwback-the-guest

see this shit for sure...but it's better NOT to know what this is about beforehand.
I don't know why the fuck I hadn't seen this beforehand or why nobody told me this was the shit.

I looked at FilmDrunks comments section for Best Films of 2014 and immediately a TON of love was thrown towards this movie's way.

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7 Days in Hell

HBO movie starring Andy Samberg and Kit Harrington (Jon Snow) with other guests.
It's a 45 minute-ish movie...and it's worth a watch. Definitely made me laugh.

 

You're Next ~~~~~~~~~~~B+

watched this because I was so impressed by THE GUEST.
This is a slasher movie where a family is terrorized. It's kind of like STRAW DOGS in the horror genre, so a little SCREAM thrown in for sure.

but these guys are really good directing/writing team...so there's something very clever/funny thrown in between everything.
There's one person inside the house who has their own secret.
and that's all I'll say about the plot.

I didn't see THE STRANGERS, but that's the feel I got with this movie when I heard about it...just know, these guys have something fun thrown up their sleeves at all times once they set everything up.

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Southpaw

just saw a screening. pretty boring. It's exactly what you'd imagine the movie to be. Couldn't be more cookie cutter. 

That, mixed with the fact that I never find jake g believable made it a tough two hours. 

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7 Days in Hell

Probably the funniest thing I've seen this year. It gets better on every subsequent viewing, which is a good thing because it is random as fuck on your first go around. But wow, its insanely quotable, and I love how each day is basically a new skit. This might be Andy Samberg's best work, and Jon Snow is surprisingly adapt at comedy. I can't decide which side character was better: Will Forte, Michael Sheen, Fred Armisen, Karen Gilliam, and David Copperfield are all great in this. Go check it out ASAP if you haven't, its only 45 minutes long and its the perfect send up of HBO Sports/ESPN 30:30 Documentaries.

A-

Ex Machina

Pretty good movie, but I was kinda disappointed by it. Everyone kept telling me it was all philosophical/deep as fuck, but it was more psychological, specifically in regards to how people objectify other people to get what they want. So that might have thrown me off a bit. The acting is all top notch, and Oscar Isaac effin' kills it as the macho boss with a God complex. That Alicia Vikander girl should blow up after this: she's like a fusion of Emilia Clarke and Natalie Portman. She has to pull off a bunch of different emotions and mannerisms in an unnatural way, plus she has to make you want to bang a robot, so props to her for pulling that off.

The ending was kinda dumb, just because it was predictable. At least it wasn't an extended horror movie chase scene like Alex Garland's other movies (fucking Sunshine ugh). The movie ultimately is alot like Her, but with a much more pessimistic tone. Props to it for being a smart, well made movie, but I don't know if I'd ever watch it again (in a way it kinda reminds me of Chronicle in that facet).

B+

Ant-Man

Not great, but it's pretty good for something with a seemingly really dumb concept. If it wasn't for Paul Rudd's charisma or the fact that they made the movie a comedy, then it would have sucked hard. The killed it with the casting in this: Rudd isn't even the best part, freaking Michael Pena is (now where's my Latino Superhero, Marvel?). I'm also glad they casted Freckles from Lost, because she'll kill it in Marvel movies in the future. On the downside, the movie is edited kinda weird (and it would have been better if Edgar Wright made it) and Peter Russo from House of Cards has probably the weakest motivation for a villain ever. They also kinda suck at explaining why Michael Douglas or Freckles couldn't be Ant-Man in the first place (I know there's a good reason in the comics, but its not explained well here). But yeah, I didn't give 2 fucks about Ant-Man before this, and now I'm excited to see him (and the Wasp) in the future.

B

Also I started watching Spy online, and it was actually really really funny, but it cut out on me 40 minutes in. So I'll get back to y'all on that.

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Cartel Land

GREAT documentary. i had no idea all the stuff going on in michoacan (probably butchered the spelling). if you have interest in the cartels in mexico, see this. some gnarly footage from the streets.

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^have to check that out. I'm a big fan of Don Winslow and he wrote THE book on cartels basically and Mexico ('the Power of the Dog' 10 years ago and this year's 'the Cartel)
the funny thing is he wrote basically about the guy who broke out of jail in a fiction story (with a LOT of truths); and that's exactly what just fucking happened.

Trainwreck ~~~~~~~~~~~B

laughed a lot, for sure, and my date loved it.

still...while I don't think it drags, it's still too long and needs editing
I kind of agree with FilmDrunk here shitting on the movie
http://uproxx.com/filmdrunk/2015/07/review-trainwreck-drowns-in-cameos/
....while also agreeing with Drew McWeeny's glowing review...
http://www.hitfix.com/motion-captured/review-amy-schumer-is-only-pretending-to-be-a-trainwreck-for-judd-apatow

Some scenes had too many jokes tacked on/riffed on. You could feel that at times.
I do think Method Man, Marv Albert/Matthew Broderick scenes were awful/didn't work at all. Some cameos worked, but I wish there were time for others (Birbiglia; Tim Meadows, people from the office; etc)
Leslie Jones=amazing in such a small scene.
Brien Larson=great and didn't know she was in this.

despite that, Hader/Schumer are too fucking great to not see this one.
I don't get the flack Schumer received for her 'body image': she's really fucking hot in this and never looked better...you DO get that she's not the 'traditional' Hollywood girl that they sell, but she still looks unbelievable. And is genuinely funny in such a strong way...and she can actually act too to boot. Most stand-ups just don't translate as actors and she does as she is classically trained

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Ice Harvest ~~~~C+

OK noir done by Harold Ramis (HAROLD RAMIS!) starring John Cusack, Billy Bob Thornton, some others.
very typical John Cusack role.

Greg Behrendt recommended the movie on a podcast since he's been binging on Cusack movies.

7 Days In Helll
can't recommend this enough

Jeffrey Ross: Roast of Prisoners~~~A-
not a movie, but a 70-minute special where he goes into a prison and roasts the prisoners...basically his version of Johnny Cash's Live at Folsom Prison. There's more to it than that, but it's definitely special to watch with some important/compassionate points to be made...and funny. I hardly ever do spit-takes, but in the opening minutes, I spat out my water (scene where Ross runs into a Nazi with Nazi tattoos and cracks a joke about how he should spend 6 million years in prison for each Jew killed): my water went fucking everywhere for that...and from that point on, I was all in.

I was getting tired of Roasts, but this was a twist.

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Mission Impossible: Rogue Nation

entertaining action sequences, but that was about it. felt like recycled plot pieces from previous installments. I just don't like Simon Pegg that much, at least in these, so it makes it a little meh for me. And renner is pretty bland too. Cruise is made for this role though, so I'm glad to see him still going for it every time. 

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